…to um, uh, what was I going to say?
Oh yeah! Lose. A mind is a terrible thing to lose. I guess one of life’s little jokes is that as we get older we experience momentary lapses in memory and/or concentration. They older you get, the goofier the results. I have certainly been reminded of my mortality of late, to wit, the following recent episodes of my encroaching senility.
Episode 1, in which we see our hero shuffling into the bathroom of a morning to perform his daily ablutions. Take meds, check. Grab toothpaste, check. Root around in the drawer for the razor, check. Apply toothpaste to razor and…Well, I almost shaved my teeth, but I realized my error just in the nick of time and brushed my face instead. Still recovering from all the cuts.
Episode 2, in which our intrepid moron, saunters over to the microwave to warm his tepid cup of coffee. Open door, insert coffee mug, close door, and wait. After staring at the machine for the requisite 50 seconds like the RCA dog listening to his master’s voice, head tilted endearingly to one side, our moron opens the door and retrieves his coffee. He takes a tentative sip. “Hmmm…seems a bit cool. This microwave must be acting up. Oh well, I’ll take a look at it later.”
Ahem. I think you need to turn the microwave ON for it to work, Dimwit!
Oh, I could go on, but there’s a limit to how much humiliation I can take before noon. Now where the hell are my glasses??
Heh, they were on my head the whole time…heh…<sigh>
