An Ounce of Prevention…

Here’s the scenario:

You’re an itinerant magician, trying to make a buck in this narcoleptic economy. You roam from place to place doing tricks, creating illusions, pulling the odd rabbit out of a hat, in the desperate hope you’ll put a smile on someone’s face and a few shekels in your pocket. Then, suddenly, catastrophe falls upon you.

An killer tornado—with sharks in it—bears down on the town where your performing. Simultaneously, a giant electromagnetic pulse is released from a nearby exploding star, all while a hitherto undiscovered pocket of white-hot “magma” churns beneath you in a hitherto undiscovered geologic fault, ready to blow you sky-high at any moment.

What will you do to save the rabbit?

Hey, it could happen. At least the government wants you to be prepared. That’s a good thing right?

As a taxpayer and an animal lover from way back, my only reaction is a double-facepalm with half-gainer.

Did I mention that the world is completely unhinged? Did I mentioned that our government is run by imbecilic Vogons?

Where are my pills?