Its earlobe-shatteringly cold here. We’ve reached our high today of -4. But that’s not important right now, because this weekend is the Big Game!
In a display of greed so colossal that the solar system itself can barely contain it, Roger “Don Fanucci” Goodell granted the Big Game to New Jersey.
Yeah, there’s all that sweet, sweet east-coast TV money, and it’s the hub of world media which is so important in getting the kickball-loving Europeans to embrace the NFL, but it’s also really frickin’ cold! The last I looked, MetLife Stadium is an outdoor arena.
Now, in fairness, the forecast isn’t that horrible…yet. But the secondary market for tickets is already running about a grand less per ticket than last year.
The only people who will enjoy this game are the bigshot, celebs in MetLife luxury suites, and you and me who have the good sense to stay home and watch on TV.
Which, when you think about it, is exactly what Don Fanucci wants anyway!
Dammit!
