Humor – Page 15 – Chewing Glass

Night (and Day) of the Lepus

In more proof that God has a sense of humor, Okunoshima Island, which used to be the home of the Japanese Imperial Army’s poison-gas weapons lab/factory, is today overrun with bunnies.

**[De Niro voice] Are you…looking at me?**

The furry descendents of the original lab animals have largely taken over the island and are protected by the Japanese government. No dogs or cats allowed.

The rabbits are apparently unafraid of humans, often approaching visitors in search of a handout or to sell postcards of Mt. Fuji and cheap, Godzilla dolls.

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That didn’t take long. The media has my blood boiling over their coverage of the Pope’s abdication and the upcoming conclave. I’m not surprised, but it still rankles. Well, Mother always said, “If you can’t say something nice about someone…”

So instead I’ll rant about Customer Service.

Companies spend fortunes on sophisticated computer systems and training for their customer service representatives, all with the aim of easing the task of helping their customers with a variety of problems.

Here’s a little word of advice: cut it out! I don’t care what company you are, or what you sell, your customer service system is mostly composed of FAIL.

Having worked in IT for many years, I know the horrors of wearing a headset. Later, when I ran my own company, the lessons I learned in the trenches were invaluable in keeping my customers from wanting to kill me. Let me share them with you:

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NFL Across the Pond

For the past couple of years, the NFL has been trying to get Europeans interested in our national pastime by playing a regular season game overseas. They’d like to do this in Germany, Canada, and other countries, but not on the scale of NFL Europa, the league’s last sorry attempt at exporting the sport around the world. Thankfully, the NFL euthanized that monstrosity in 2007, but hasn’t completely given up it’s plans for world domination.

Lately, the Brits have been hosting the game. From what I’ve observed, they don’t exactly know what to make of it. They applaud politely when something happens. They dress up in team colors to enter more deeply in the fan experience. They find the game fast and loud, which is fun, but in the end they don’t get it.

Well, if the NFL should decide to base some teams across the pond, Dave at Dave’s Art Locker has already been working on it. The rest of the NFC North is below the fold…

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What is This??

Roots! The triumph of an American Affenpinscher!

This little, uh, dog is the Best in Show winner at Westminster this year.

So did they run out of real dogs?

To add to the poor thing’s national humiliation, his owners named him…Banana Joe.

Good grief!

You can see more of, ahem, Joe here.

Arithmetic

When I was a boy in school, I used to love arithmetic. It gave such a sense of satisfaction when you found the correct solution to a problem. Ya know? I still feel that way. Let’s try some simple equations together: