Roadkill Saturday

roadkill_funnyLong, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, a young Rob worked in a tweedy, old mens’ haberdashery.  Being retail, one had to work on Saturday, and autumn Saturdays were always my favorite.

I worked with one old-timer named Phil, who’s grown son Mark lived in town. Mark worked for Georgia Pacific during the week, but on weekends, he turned into a chef.

So, Saturday morning, while we were still Windexing the tie case and straightening the Countess Mara sweaters, preparing for another lazy day of schlepping rags, the phone would ring…

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Does His Highness Want His Ba-ba?

Bring me my tea! And a corgi!
Bring me tea! And a corgi!

George Alexander Louis of Cambridge.

Well, this bumps Prince Harry to fourth in line for the throne. He comes after after his new nephew, his big brother the Duke of Cambridge and his dad, Big Ears, the Prince of Wales respectively.

Prince Andrew, the Duke of York falls to a distant fifth. It’s all very complicated.

So who’s the Duke of Earl?

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We Aim to Please

April 15th…hmmm, seems there’s something I was supposed to do today, what was it? Something important…[drums fingers on desk]…oh well, if it was important, I would have written it down somewhere.

Anyway, “Ellie” writes in to ask:

Could you write about Phsycis so I can pass Science class?

Well, first let’s start with spelling shall we? If you want to pass Physics class, you must remember the following:

Entropy isn’t what it used to be.


Time is God’s way of keeping everything from happening at once.

Good luck there Ellie. You’ll need it.

What Do You Do When You’re Broke?

Simple: You borrow 100 meeelion dollars! Good gravy! The thieves civil servants at piggybankCity Hall are going to purty-up the river from Wacker to State Street on YOUR dime dear fellow-taxpayer.

On behalf of the panhandlers, clockers, and bond traders who frequent the riverfront, I say thank you. Will the last person in Illinois please turn out the lights when you leave? Thank you.

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Meanwhile, in the World of Art…

Ooo. Ahh.
Ooo. Ahh.

I’m no art critic, but I appreciate creativity and here’s creativity on a very large scale. Christo, who you might have heard of for his surreal art installations, has done it again with the, ahem, Big Air Package. Strange on the outside, kinda magical on the inside.

Christo and his late wife collaborated on some truly whimsical art such as Surrounded Islands and the Wrapped Reichstag. With the Big Air Package, he created a giant balloon inside an empty gas storage tank. Give the man credit for his project management chops, because doing stuff this big has got to be complicated as hell!

Now, we all know that some of what passes for art, clearly isn’t. Say what you like about Christo, he definitely makes you stop and think. It’s just too bad that we as a society have become so jaded, that we only react to stunts, and not to the beauty that surrounds us every day.

If spring ever comes, go outside and stare at a flower for a while. I’ll bet it will elicit a quiet “Wow!”

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