Author: Rob

Brother Can You Spare A Dime?

american-hobos-hobo1Actually, can you make it a quarter? Inflation and all.

Apart from being cold—I’ve beat that horse to a bloody pulp already—this is also the time of the year when everybody has their hands out.

Taxes, insurance renewals, taxes, homeowners’ association, taxes, and so on.

My wallet’s gotten so light that I’m down to one package of ramen noodles a day, and only run the van’s motor for 20 minutes each night to stay warm!

To quote my old college roommate, “I’m po! So poor I can’t afford the o and the r.”

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Howz by You?

snowfanIts earlobe-shatteringly cold here. We’ve reached our high today of -4. But that’s not important right now, because this weekend is the Big Game!

In a display of greed so colossal that the solar system itself can barely contain it, Roger “Don Fanucci” Goodell granted the Big Game to New Jersey.

Yeah, there’s all that sweet, sweet east-coast TV money, and it’s the hub of world media which is so important in getting the kickball-loving Europeans to embrace the NFL, but it’s also really frickin’ cold! The last I looked, MetLife Stadium is an outdoor arena.

Now, in fairness, the forecast isn’t that horrible…yet. But the secondary market for tickets is already running about a grand less per ticket than last year.

The only people who will enjoy this game are the bigshot, celebs in MetLife luxury suites, and you and me who have the good sense to stay home and watch on TV.

Which, when you think about it, is exactly what Don Fanucci wants anyway!

Dammit!

Online Keno is Addictive!

seuratSince I was asked recently, none to subtly, what was up with the book, I thought I’d give you an update.

[BTW Jack, you weren’t the only person who’s asked me that recently.]

I really am pretty damn close to finished…with the first draft. *cough*

Look, it took Europe 22 years to start WWII after they finished the first one. I’ve got a lot of ground to cover so I’d appreciate it if you got up outta my grill about it, m’kay?

Seriously though.

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I Think It’s Time to Move

Non-Sequitur-Shoveling-SnowFor those of you who were unaware, it’s been, well, cold of late. And snowy. Now I’ve been through cold weather before but never like this and its got me thinkin’…

A few days ago, after shoveling the driveway for the second time in four hours, I sat in my chair staring at a cheery fire and sweating profusely. My complexion was a light shade of Barney the Dinosaur purple instead of my usual healthy green.

Apparently, I was muttering quietly.

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Public Service Announcement

Don’t go outside. No, really. Don’t.

It warmed all the way up to -13 here in the prairie ghetto. That’s with a -34 windchill. By way of comparison, it’s 40 degrees warmer in Anchorage Alaska right now.

So wherever you are, stay put m’kay?

Beautiful-Beach-Resort-HD-Wallpaper