Timewaster for Writers

Wake me if Spielberg calls.

As if writers needed more ways to waste time, but that’s beside the point…

Here’s a fun flash-bashed game for aspiring writers. I scored 92! I’m William Frickin’ Shakespeare!

In the “Color Me Ign’ant” department: I’m in the midst of re-reading Inside the Cup by Winston Churchill. Guess what? It’s not written by Winston Churchill! Not the one you’re thinking of anyway.

Nevertheless, Sir Winston was a prolific writer. In fact, that’s pretty much how he earned his living when out of favor politically. He used to write/edit at a stand up desk, that is, after rising late and breakfasting on scotch and soda in the bathtub. Well, I got that part down.

What do Marcel Proust’s Remembrance of Things Past, Beatrix Potter’s The Adventures of Peter Rabbit, and James Joyce’s Ulysses have in common? Using my patented INVISIBLE ELECTRON technology, you can view the answer here:

Highlight for answer –> They’re all self-published books!

Sorry for the link-baiting, but traffic is traffic.

That’s a Wrap!

One of these men is a NY Times best-selling author.
One of these men is a NY Times best-selling author.

LitFest ’14 was a success! Perfect weather, lots of people, and many books were sold. As usual at these things, I met some very interesting folks.

First was my table-mate, Jim Garner, from whom I learned lots about life as an author as well as a host of disturbing facts about the circus. Great guy, despite having graduated from that little school in SE Michigan. Check out his latest book featuring Rex Koko, Private Clown.

SW Michigan was well

Sylvester Boyd
Sylvester Boyd

represented too. Check out Allegan-native Sylvester Boyd’s book, The Road from Money. It’s the story of his aunt’s life growing up in the rural south in the early 20th century. Sylvester grew up on the south side of Chicago before moving to Michigan when he was fifteen. Now he’s back in the Windy City, writing, speaking, traveling, and loving life. The youngest looking seventy-one year old, I’ve ever met!

There was another notable artist on hand that I want to mention. His name is Lakey. He’s an itinerant artist and poet. A real free spirit. Visit his FB page here.


Chewing Glass, R.I.P

From my last EKG
From my last EKG

Just kidding..although it is on life support. Sorry for neglecting you, but life ya know?

So, whacha-been-got-goin’ on?

Me, I’m all set for LitFest. Remember, if you find yourself in the vicinity of Dearborn and Harrison tomorrow, stop by the Chicago Writer’s Association tent from 10-2:00 and say, “Hey!”

We’re right across from the Hotel Blake.

But there’s so much more to do than seeing my pretty face. There’s music, food, books, books-complete-with-authors, food, and food. S’posed to be beautiful this weekend too! LitFest runs through Sunday, so if you can’t make it tomorrow, you can visit after church.

In other news, the Chinese have taken over my spam bucket. Knock-off Fauxlex watches, “Mulberry” designer bags, Nikeee shoes, and lots of half-assed Google Translate gibberish. Do you suppose somewhere on a desert island in the South China Sea, there’s a penal colony where the prisoners are forced to spam all day before their evening beatings?

I like to think so.

Continue reading “Chewing Glass, R.I.P”

Look at All the Cobwebs!

Can I drive now?

Hi Mom!

Since you’re the only one still reading my bloglet, I thought I’d let you know where I’ve been…

A Bronze Wall is just about ready to send to the publisher. My test drafts have gotten good reviews, so I’ve been editing my little fingers to the bone. I’m not good at doing more than one thing at a time so that’s why I haven’t been around here much.

Besides ABW, I’ve been getting ready for LitFest 2014 and doing a little “life enrichment.”

Continue reading “Look at All the Cobwebs!”

Printers Row LitFest 2014

chi-printers-row-lit-fest-logo-20140213Seemed like winter would never let go! It snowed around here last week—can you believe it? Well, now it looks like Spring is here and that means LitFest!

If you find yourself in Chicago June 7-8, c’mon out and see Chicagoland’s literati…and me.

I’ll be in the Chicago Writer’s Association tent (that’s “F” this year), on Dearborn Street, on Saturday.

Come one, come all!

Oh no! There goes Tokyo!


If you’ve been here before, you know I have bad taste. Music, clothes, hairstyle. It’s pretty evident.

But nowhere is my lack of refinement more apparent than in my love of cheesy, giant-rubber-monster movies. Give me Gamera vs. Gaos, and I’m a quivering, drooling, fan-boy.

When Cloverfield came out, I couldn’t wait to see it because here was an attempt to do a creature-feature with a straight face. I wasn’t disappointed. After I saw it, I had to see it again.

Well, that is after I finished throwing up from motion sickness. Despite its lack of a coherent script, rife with more plot holes than an episode of the Simpsons, and its stupid “realistic” cinematography, it still managed to check all of my monster boxes.

Continue reading “Oh no! There goes Tokyo!”

Journal – Friday April 18

What have I done?

They’ve gone and condemned him to death! I thought they’d just give him a stern talking to, maybe a fine and then kick him out of the city with a warning. But instead they’re going to kill him!

Kill him.

When I saw him come from the Governor’s mansion, he was a mess! They beat him to a bloody pulp! I immediately ran to C’s house to try and stop this, but he refused to see me. I made such a fuss that he finally agreed to let me in. The others were there too.

I told them what they’d done to The Boss. I told them I couldn’t take their money. I told them they didn’t hold up their end of the bargain! I never wanted to see him beaten. I didn’t want him to die! I just wanted him, I don’t know, out of the way. I just wanted to be free of him. I wanted him out of my head! But not like this!

Continue reading “Journal – Friday April 18”